Adoption Advice Leaflets
Over years working in the field of adoption we have had a chance to work with many people who are going through an intermediary search process, and we have learned much from this from our clients. In this range of forty leaflets, we want to share knowledge and understanding with you on the many highs and lows of the journey you may be thinking of making: from the sunny uplands of being in contact with a long lost relative to the lows and confusion of relatives who don’t wish to be in touch or indeed of finding that your relative is deceased.
It is unusual for any human being to embark on a task where they are unsure of the actual outcome and we must warn people from the outset that despite their investment in terms of time, money and emotion in our service, they may not get the outcome that they wish for. We have worked with many people through days of the unknown and we understand that this is arduous. We wish to soften these blows as much as possible and our duty of care provokes us to protect you through good information and a closely guided process. So whether you are managing a non-contact outcome or you are trying to work out why the work takes so long or indeed why it provokes anxiety and why we are always measuring risk and undertaking safeguarding measures and paying attention to history, then take a good look and see if you find some re-assuring words to support you.
Our Adoption Service for Adults Affected by Adoption is always on hand for enquiries, please contact us. We are rated as Outstanding by Ofsted but we are not complacent and it does not make the task any easier for any of us. We wont hide, this is a complex venture, and it will involve the highs and lows of life and a good deal of life skill to get through. We hope that this reading will help and if not do talk with us about our service.
This is a private fee-paying service but if we can we will direct you to other services that support free of charge.
Dr. Joanna North
Constultant Psychotherapist (Adoption)
Spring 2024.
Adoption Advice Leaflets
1. Different responses to meetings

2. Helping your reunion be the best it can be

3. Hope for the best prepare for anything

4. Reactions to rejection

5. What if you feel no connection

6. What to say in your first letter to a relative

7. What will I tell my adoptive family?

8. When you do not want to be in touch

9. Where and how to meet

10. Why does this take so long

11. When the subject is deceased

12. Genetic sexual attraction

13. If you didn’t know you were adopted

14. Your birth records

15. Keeping you safe

16. Your adoption journey

17. Why choose counselling with us

18. Our risk assessment

19. If our approach is a surprise

20. The problem with interrupting due process

21. The Adoption Contact Register

22. What to consider before you say ‘yes’

23. You didn’t know your parent had another child

24. My children don’t know I had a child adopted

25. Further risk assessment questions

26. Under 25? Why your search is different

27. Your intention and mindset

28. Managing anxiety

29. The adoption journey

30. Steps to find birth parents

31. Trauma and your mental health

32. Shame and guilt over adoption

33. Historical abuse

34. You didn’t know your parent was not your parent

35. When we contact your relatives

36. Always guard your identity

37. You didn’t know you were a dad

38. Reaching out to adoptive parents

39. The final contact letter goes out

40. Research references that inform our work
